None:
Polyps:
Strongs:

Proof By Retardation

If a loving God of infinite wisdom truly gifts His people (believers) with “good gifts” then we should ask why is man sorely lacking? Why is man so prideful that he thinks he is the smartest machine ever to walk (or whatever) upon the Earth? It wouldn’t take much for God to put man in his place and gift Him with the intellect and wisdom to humble him with true enlightenment. A couple of thousand IQ points would not harm man or an infinite God over him surely? God would not even notice the difference to Himself, but that man would become closer to Him, and more able (I assume) to correct his own smugness. If this were done only by God; man would now truly know whom to respect, surely.

So, given that such a loving God gives such gifts and that man has ruined His Earth; why is everyone on Earth so damn retarded?

We may safely assume that all such atheists (the smartest people on the planet – they have “proof”!) are actually as it is defined; they are all retards. So therefore, everyone is possibly* retarded as "they" are the smartest, ergo God does not exist.

God does not exist because “there are retards that don’t believe in Him”. Those that do believe in Him are “young” and will live forever; enjoy your childhood! You’ll only truly get one!

So, whoever thought that all ontological arguments fall into the same category, kudos to you; I’m thinking of you!

*As to why only "possibly"; some retards obviously have not become atheists yet.

Of course, a simple objection is that the stupidity of humanity compared to their creator does not define God out of existence. After all, I have axiomatically discounted the possibility that there are non-retards that believe in God, God Himself for one. It could be argued that atheists are not the smartest people on the planet simply because they have letters after their names. It may also be accurate that such stupidity is not universal, because of this one transitive "fact" and also that God is so interested in waiting to gift His children, because stupidity can be rather amusing. (There is no necessity found, but only the contingent possibility that people are (every one) stupid: the existence of God does not follow from the fact that everyone other than Him may be stupid (a contingency), much like the UAA does not hold when understood in the same perfect understanding of God.)

So, necessary non-existence does not follow, as neither does possible non-existence due to the introduction of this second class of the divine (non-retarded). And yet, it is to be carefully stated there are no necessarily retarded, even atheists; all can come to the gifts of God, that is, when God is ready to gift them with every good gift.


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